It's 2010....

It feels so odd to be back again in the life of painmeds, being tired and just drop off when speaking with someone when the eyes don't wanna stay open. I try to understand that this is now and not 10 years ago when I had my first very big flare of RSD/CRPS pain.
But there are differences that makes me realize that I am not totally crazy thinking I am 10 years younger. My kids are sort of grown up. I don't have to be the one who makes food and take care of them 24/7. Now they instead take care of me. I can more relax in knowing that the world doesn't go under if I haven't the strenght to cook some food and I don't have to take them out on different occasions. I can just be me........ .

PAIN

Slowly, slowly filling me up.
Gently touching me, makes more then enough.
I got you from one second to another
You made life crazy, you made me sadder
You also made me rich,
Wisedom of myself, but you were no wish
I don't know if I hate you
I can never regret you, that is the truth
You will be with me now
You will be with me tomorrow, my own sorrow
Pain is your name
Not leaving me alone, more of insane
You can have pain of sorrow and pain in soul
But no matter pain always dig a deep,deep hole