Long time ago...and what happens...

It's a really long time since I wrote anything at all here. A lot has happened since then. I have made some huge steps in my life and from now I am on my own after a long relationship and in to a new one. To be "disabled" a word that I seldom use, can be scarey when you are in to make big changes in your life. Like with everyone else, you know what you have but you don't know what you get, what to expect and what you actually can manage. And when you like me have more difficulties in life, then big changes is harder to go through. You just hope you will be able take care of yourself and get a life that is working for you.
Into my process I discovered something very quickly. If you are in a relationship it's harder to get what you need then when you are alone, even if you have the same needs.
I have been asking to get an extra wheelchair for many years, but that hasn't been working until now when I live on my own. Frankly I can't tell the difference. When I got my e-motion wheels( it's like an extra motor on the wheels that lessen the power I need to use to wheel myself with 50 to 80%) a couple of months ago then I couldn't get an extra wheelchair. So I had to manage to be able change wheels on my own and they are very heavy. I tried like twice and both times I couldn't almost anything more the same day. But now on my own, no problems to get the 2 wheelchairs I need. I didn't even almost have to ask for it.
Independency is wether you are in a relationship or not very important. I think that every human being value that very high. When you are "disabled"( oh the word came again...) you value even more the smallest things you can do by yourself. I also learnt another thing in this process of being my own....paperwork. Don't ask me how many papers I have copied and filled in and sent. And many times you send same papers to the same place BUT you have to send them in separate envelopes. I thought today in the computerworld we have, that papers would be less important. But seems to be the opposite that what is written and done online has no value. The same if you change adress and move somewhere else or if your family changes and you are into changing subscriptions. You call, get forms to fill in and get copies back.
So now I'm here and appriciating my life more then ever.
I'm right now thinking what's the next step in life is. What will I become in my adult life ?
So my next process is to find that out. It's giving me butterflies in my tummy, but at same time it's giving me a feeling of maybe I am needed somewhere. We all have a place where we are needed but have have to find out where....and I don't think it's to late in life for me.